Laughter: Use It to Pick Up Women

One of the best ways of picking up women is by making them laugh. Here,
I supply some such funny stories to start up a conversation.

Humour, some say, is the fruit of life, and this is especially true when
it comes to picking up on a girl no matter where the location. Make them
laugh, and I guarantee, that you are very close to getting their phone
number and even to getting them to go out with you.

But, as we all know, making them laugh, is easier said than done.
Precisely for those who find it difficult to come up with something
funny to say, I am adding some funny anecdotes and wise cracks that you
can memorize and then use in those situations where you need to get the
girl in front of you to laugh.

1) The Prescription:
Did you hear of the lady, who walked into the pharmacist and asked for
arsenic?
The man behind the counter asked in wonder, "What do you need that for?
The lady calmly replied," to kill my husband."
The pharmacist was taken aback," Are you crazy? Do you want to get us
both into jail? And, anyway, why do you want to kill him? Go to a
counselor. Get help for your marriage."
The lady paused and from her purse she removed a set of pictures of her
husband and the wife of the pharmacist in some very creative postures.
The pharmacist looked at the snaps, put them down and smiled," lady, why
did you not tell me that you have a prescription?"

2) The Tip Book
A wife calls out to her husband, "Have you seen the book, 101 Tips to
Live for More Than a Hundred Years?
The husband sheepishly replies, "I burnt it."
"What?" the wife shouted out," why?"
The husband whispered back," Because your mother wanted to read it."

3) Range of Food
Looking at his wife fry meat balls in all kinds of shapes and sizes, Tom
tapped her on the shoulder, "Why?"
His wife turned," Because you asked for a variety of food."

4) Mushrooms
Tom was picking mushrooms from the forest floor with his wife, when she
picked up one and showed it to Tom," Is this for eating?"
Tom smiled," Yes. As long as you do not cook it."

5) Driving Around
Tom greeted his wife when she returned home," So, my dear, how was your
first time driving all alone?"
His wife smiled coyly, "Do you want to hear it from me or read about it
in the papers?

6) Drama
A couple are watching a film in their local theater when the wife
snuggles close to her husband and points to the screen," Do you think
that they will get married in the end?"
The husband sighs," Yes. These movies always have bad endings."

7) The Library
Tom visited the local library, walks up to the librarian and asks, "Do
you know where I can find the book, the Supremacy of Men over Women?"
The librarian conducts a short search on the computer and looks up," you
will be able to find it in the science fiction."

Conclusion:
While some of these might sound offensive, if you use them well you will
be able to display not just a sense of humour, but also that you are
exactly the opposite of the stereotype. How? Immediately, after you
done, lean over and whisper, But I am not like that, and if you allow me
to take you out, you will see that for yourself.