To blame means to accuse someone of doing something wrong. It is very
easy to put blame on a person when things begin going wrong and hammer
that person left and right for being responsible for all the mess. Let
us look at this further.
Sometimes, in our personal relationships, when we say that things are in
mess, the truth may be different. The situation may not be messy, but
our viewpoint may have become messy. What we call as going wrong may
indeed be going wrong, but not in the way we look at it. Let me try to
explain. Some of us lie. We get caught, or feel guilty. We blame someone
for exposing our lie and making a mess of something good. Can a lie be
good? We wished our lies to flourish and keep us safe from the
bitterness of truth, but our comfort zone got broken because of the
exposure. Is this bad? Or our viewpoint was wrong to begin with? When we
think more, we find that truth may be very bitter and highly
discomforting, but it is always better than a lie. Is it correct to
blame a person who exposed our lies? But we do that. Blame the other
person for making us face the music. What the other person did was
correct but since it hurts us, we accuse.
Let me tell you something. What if someone accuses you of crimes never
committed by you? What if the accuser himself/herself was the guilty
party, but targeted you because you are a soft target? Between a couple
this happens. If one of the partners is a compassionate person, the
other partner can develop the habit of blaming him/her all the time of
all the crimes realizing well, that no retaliation will occur.
Many of us act like brutes at times and then we suffer in the guilt for
a lifetime. Some of us, who are evil people never, suffer any guilt. But
some of us carry the guilt of having done something wrong forever in our
life. This guilt will never go, because the deed was indeed done. Why
not to desist doing wrong? Why to travel on a wrong path? Why to torture
others with blames that they never deserve?
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